President Gets His ASIMO Kicked During Football Game with Robot

President Obama blamed his poor performance on the cut
of his suit.

by Kamran Ramsden

President Obama was left impressed and astounded today as he was challenged to a kick about by a humanoid robot on a recent visit to Tokyo.

Though it is currently unclear as to who won the game, the US Head of State was clearly impressed with it's athletic abilities: ‘He’s really moving,’ he exclaimed as ASIMO demonstrated actions such as kicking the ball as well as sprinting away from the President as he tried to ask ASIMO whether or not he thought the Affordable Care Act was a good idea.

Moyes Scouted by UKIP Leader After Keeping Man Utd Out of Europe

by Mike Woodfine

Ex-Manchester United manager David Moyes has been seeing cracking his first smile in 6 months after suggestions by UKIP leader Nigel Farage that he should come and join his party.

When asked whether or not he was worried about EU migrants taking Moyes' now vacant position at Manchester United, he said 'Moyes has managed to get Manchester out of Europe, so maybe he might come and join UKIP during this campaign.'